admin_rock

Changing the Game

I’ve been thinking about game mods lately. For those not in the know, mods are user developed “add-ons” for video games that change the appearance or the features of a game. They’ve grown increasing popular in the last decade, and for some game like Minecraft, they’re pretty much standard for most players.

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The thing I love about mods is they represent a brilliant opportunity in the evolution of gaming. They’re an example of the feedback loop in action. The old development cycle was this:

Developer has an idea -> build game -> tests -> release game -> moves on to next project.

But with the advent of online forums and social media, fans are much more vocal about what they want in a game, and while I’m the first to warn content creators about trying to please ALL of the people all of the time, the fans are not only speaking, they’re now creating.

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If we think of mods as the individual’s way of responding to the work(the game), mods are essentially a way to add something that was not there, or missing. To that end, while not every mod needs to be embraced and cherished, really popular mods must represent something the players want or need.

Dissenting Opinions

The Correctness has shared a LOT of opinions about pretty much everything we’ve ever discussed. In the pop culture internet world, it’s easy to both find something to have an opinion on, and also to share it. It’s also very, very easy to be lulled in to thinking that the more vocal someone is, the better their opinion is. In a world with Twitter, a thought can be retweeted and parroted instantly around the world, long before it’s thought through or reflected on. Sites with message boards can quickly form a “line” on subjects and excoriate any one who strays from it.

Rewatching LOST

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So, in the last few months, I’ve spent more time online at The AV Club’s TV Club, and less time on Fark. There’s a whole other article as to why, but in a nutshell, Fark seems to be getting ‘meaner’, and way more sexist that it was, and TV Club comments are just funnier, and more clever. One of their features is rewatching older shows, and reviewing a couple of episodes a week. One of those show is LOST.

Unless you’ve lived under a rock since 2004, you likely have a least a passing familiarity with the show and it’s ‘trapped on a desert island’ premise. More likely, you’re familiar with the outcry at it’s completion, with the internet exploding in anguish over unsatisfactory answers etc.

Facelift

It’s been a very long time since anyone posted to The Correctness. No shame, no blame. We’re busy folks, very busy. Tbinns is tackling toddler-raising and full time writing, RobbieRobTown is in intensive care after yet another Wendigo attack, and I’ve been creating Lego projects non-stop. But I still love The Correctness. So I’m updating […]

Super Heroine Smackdown Semi Final 2: Storm vs Kitty Pryde

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This week: An All X-Men battle as Kitty Pryde takes on Storm

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Let’s get it on like a freshly loaded bong.

Super Heroine Smackdown Week 4: Kitty Pryde vs Batgirl

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This week, it’s fan favorite Kitty Pryde vs Gotham’s favorite daughter, Batgirl:

 

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Super Heroine Smackdown Week 3: Rogue vs Storm

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This week, It’s all X-Men (women) match-up. Why? Cuz we let RobbieRobTown design the bracket. Nonetheless:

 

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Super Heroine Smackdown- Week 2: Wonder Woman vs. Jean Grey

This week, Wonder Woman takes on Jean Grey. (Note: We’re using the most current, non-Phoenix version.)

 

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Super Heroine Smackdown – Week 1 : Ramona Flowers vs. Carrie Kelley

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Week one! Ramona Vs. Robin (vs. The World?) Superheroine Smackdown begins!

Super Heroine Smackdown Rules

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In the past few years, The Correctness has brought you the Superhero Smackdown, which was quite popular and contentious to some.Next was the Villains turn, and a bonus Team Smackdown. Then the Action Smackdown. All of these were presented with tasty sidecards brought to you by RobbieRobTown.

So this year, it’s the ladies’ turn, pitting 16 of your favorite comic book gals against each other for the prize: bragging rights.

You’re Getting Too Old for this S*#!

Not sure if it’s just co-incidental timing, or studios wanting to burn these films off in the slow season, but we’ve been hit with the 1-2-3 punch of action films starring some the greatest names in Action cinema.

In 1988, if you told me I’d get a Stallone, a Schwarzenegger, and a Bruce Willis film within months of one another, two things would be true: It would be summer, and I would be really happy. But 1988 was a LONG time ago. Now it’s 2013, and this triple threat is well… sad.

Smackdown – Expo 2013

Hey folks, just got word that The Correctness has a panel spot for Calgary Expo 2013. That can only mean Live Smackdown! I’ll post the details when we have them.

Admin Rock Roundup – January 23, 2013

Back with Admin_Rock’s weekly look at what’s hot, and what’s cool, (at least in his world.)

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It’s been months since I shared what I watch and hear and make. You all must be so stressed. Fear not, I bring you the updated lists.

FILM

Watched Best Exotic Marigold Hotel with Mrs. Admin Rock the other night. It was just as wonderful the second time. If you like old people, or India, or any combination thereof, you’ll enjoy this film. You might confuse it with Wes Anderson’s Moonrise Kingdom, but here’s a simple way to tell them apart: BEMH is actually about something, and doesn’t spend most of its time wistfully staring with vaseline on the lens. Okay, I haven’t actually seen Moonrise Kingdom, because I just don’t get Wes Anderson. Been burned too many times. I’m sure he’s all talented and awesome, but it’s like that movie that all your friends rave about, then you go see it, and it sucks donkey balls. It’s exactly like that. Donkeyballful. Donkeybawful.

On a recent flight, I watched both The Bourne Legacy, and Taken 2, without sound. Rather, they were on, and I glanced up occasionally, and wondered if any part of these films didn’t involve a chase, or standoff of some kind. I feel like I made the wiser choice.

The Twelve Days of Christmas – Intern Ellis style

(Intern Ellis upstages all by actually filing an article. Admin_Rock posts it a day late).

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DECEMBER FIRST: INTRODUCTION
Ah, December. That wonderful time of year when we set down our quarrels, pick up a mug of hot cocoa, sit by the Shaw fire log and turn on our favourite Christmas album, Christmas with the Chipmunks. And if that’s not your favourite Christmas album, turn off your computer.

Dear AvX: You suck.

Marvel’s big summer event “AvX” (Avengers vs X-Men) concluded recently, and I’d be remiss if I didn’t offer up some insight in the true Correctness fashion. Spoilers abound.

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The basic premise of the event is that the Phoenix Force is heading for Earth, and bringing destruction with it!!!!!

Read more…

Admin Rock Roundup – Oct 9, 2012

Back with Admin_Rock’s weekly look at what’s hot, and what’s cool, (at least in his world.)

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Summer is over, new Television is with us, and the crappy Movie season begins.

Is this thing on?

Admin_rock looks cautiously around the room. Seems okay.

Moving Time

Hey Dudes and Dudettes. We’re moving the site to a new host, and thus, things might be wonky (almost certainly) until Admin_Rock figures out how to do it properly. Expect weirdness for the next few days. See you on the other side.

Admin_Rock Roundup – Sept 12,2012

Back with Admin_Rock’s weekly look at what’s hot, and what’s cool, (at least in his world.)

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Admin Rock Roundup Aug 23,2012

Back with Admin_Rock’s weekly look at what’s hot, and what’s cool, (at least in his world.) Hey folks, normally this happens on Monday, but I was busy earlier this week, better late than never. FILM The Bond marathon stalled out at Octopussy. God Damn that was a terrible movie. I’ll rally and move through the […]

Admin Rock Roundup Aug 2, 2012

Back with Admin_Rock’s weekly look at what’s hot, and what’s cool, (at least in his world.) Hey folks, normally this happens on Monday, but I was busy earlier this week, better late than never. FILM Watched that body switch movie with Jason Bateman and Ryan Reynolds. The fact that I’m too disinterested to either remember […]

Admin Rock Roundup July 23, 2012

Back with Admin_Rock’s weekly look at what’s hot, and what’s cool, (at least in his world.)

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Comic-Con Update: Friday

ADMIN_ROCK: Well, finally dragged myself to the laptop, and I’m here to provide an update for Friday. Let’s see…. waited in line, walked a few feet, waited in line some more. Apart from that, I scored a couple of pretty sweet Lego minifigs (Phoenix and Captain Marvel), met JMS and had him sign the best panel he’s ever written (the “reveal” moment with Ezekiel), and moments later had a really short conversation with Jim Lee about my Lego Mosaic. Verdict: “Yeah, great, that’s really nice”. (“Keep moving, fanboy”). CubReporterK and I went to a panel on Justice League and what lies ahead, and Thursday I also went to a “Court Of Owls” panel which had some cool stuff on the future of Batman. Also visited the Revolution area, NBC is really pushing this show! Then back to the Lego booth for a while, where Gene Simmons waltzed through.


Comic-Con 2012 – Thursday

CubReporterK and I have journeyed down to Comic-Con. Our journey down has filled with airplanes, shuttle bus waits, and a fight with Shelob. So far the biggest line was waiting to get in to the bathroom. More as it develops.

Admin Rock Roundup – July 9, 2012

Back with Admin_Rock’s weekly look at what’s hot, and what’s cool, (at least in his world.)

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Quiet Morning

That is all.

Admin_Rock Roundup – July 2, 2012

Back with Admin_Rock’s weekly look at what’s hot, and what’s cool, (at least in his world.)

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Admin Rock Roundup – June 25,2012

Back with Admin_Rock’s weekly look at what’s hot, and what’s cool, (at least in his world.)

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Join us, won’t you?

Changes Abound

Hey folks, just a quick Friday morning note to remind you all to drink enough water, take your vitamins, and be safe out there. Also wanted to let you know that things are rocking and rolling here at The Correctness. We’ve moved to a new office (slightly smaller, more manageable), and we’re taking on a […]

Admin Rock roundup

Hey folks, things have been a bit sparse post-wise lately, with many things going on in our various worlds. Since it’s Monday, and I’m on a Father’s Day food hangover, I’d go easy today, and do a nice relaxed general pop culture check in. So let’s dive right in. Don’t be confused, the stuff discussed here isn’t all new and upcoming, it’s just the stuff I’m “consuming” right now.

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Goodnight Ray.

Heard about the passing of ray Bradbury this morning, and it made me reflect on his work and his importance to the world of science fiction. Well, really to the world of fiction in general. No hard stats, but I suspect Ray was responsible for more than a few people deciding to go in to the field of science and space.

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Game of Silent Thrones

Admin Rock here. But you probably knew that. Wanted to weigh in on something I’ve been pondering for a few weeks now. While the geek community can be very flash in the pan about certain things, we do tend to obsess endlessly about most things we love. If you don’t believe me, consider that Star Wars opened in 1976, and we STILL endlessly debate its merits. (I’m still on Team “Bored with it now”.) So I have a question: What the hell happened to Game of Thrones?

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Last Resort

Another TV related post today. You know those people who say “I don’t watch TV”, while looking down their noses at you? Well, f*ck those people. I’m TV’s bitch. TV and I love each other, and YOU CAN’T STOP OUR LOVE!!!!

ABC has released their trailer for a new series called “Last Resort”. It passed the Admin_Rock test for watch-worthiness pretty quickly. It’s Exec producer is Shawn Ryan, of The Shield fame. It stars Andre Frickin Braugher, who I would watch reading a grocery list. (I’ve been rewatching the first couple of seasons of Homicide lately. Braugher is fantastic.) It takes place on a tropical island. It has submarines.

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Revolution Trailers and JJ

Hey folks, Admin_Rock here. Remember when there used to be three (or four) of us bringing you our thoughts and musings? Yeah, me too. Rather than excessive whining about why it is that the busiest of us somehow is holding the bag and bringing you new content, let’s just jump right in:

NBC has picked up the latest show from JJ Abrams called “Revolution”.

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Avengers Review – Admin Rock

The Avengers kicked butt at the box office. Admin_Rock offers up his review of the film. (Some Spoilers, nothing major)

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Admin_Rock here. I had the pleasure of joining RobbieRobTown to see The Avengers on Friday night, and then again today with Mrs. Admin_Rock and Admin_Jr. My first piece of advise is that this film, while loaded with action and humor, is best the first time.

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Missing Expo and Avengers

Well, due to powers out of our control, there was no Smackdown panel at Calgary Expo this year. We’re looking at returning for next year, and also possibly one or two cons in the USA this year (more as it develops). So instead, some of Admin_Rock’s Expo adventures…

 
 
 

I had booth for my Brickwares Lego stuff, it looked like this.
Brickwares Booth

Jayne

A little cross geekiness for you today.

Last year, I booked a table in the Artist Alley at the Calgary Expo, and sold a lot of small (16×16) mosaics. You can see a bunch of them here. I had a blast, and things went really well. So well, in fact, that I decided to upgrade to a full booth this year. When I looked through the line-up of guests booked, I wondered which of them I should make a mosaic of. Making mosaics takes a long time, and the subject has to be something interesting. I decided on a mosaic of Adam Baldwin as Jayne Cobb from “Firefly”. Always loved that show, and Adam was great on it.

And so it was.

I tweeted a picture of it to Adam Baldwin today, and he seems to like it. I’m looking forward to meeting up with him at Calgary Expo and getting it signed. If you’re at the expo, drop by the booth and say hi. (Booth 1000, near the guest signing area). Remember that I do custom portraits etc. drop me a line and we’ll sort it all out.

The Art of Timing

(ed: SPOILER WARNING – This article makes reference to plot events from “The Walking Dead”.)

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Last week, we posted an episode review from a show from the future. As the primary author, I had written the bulk of it, and then asked RobbieRobTown to have a look at it, to see if he had any insight or notes. The article was mostly my effort to recreate that feeling you get when you see people obsessively carrying on about something you’re completely unfamiliar with. In the midst of the article, I decided to add one specific outright joke.

Episode Review: Translocution S05E11-“Solace”

(ed: This article was found in the trunk of RobbieRobTown’s time travelling car, dated March 12, 2022.)

Hey folks, here’s this week’s Ep review of Translocution. This week’s installment is called “Solace”, but there wasn’t any to be found for our main characters.
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Things opened up with the long awaited meeting between Jake and Kelsie. Kelsie was still in possession of the stolen blueprints, and Jake pressed her for their whereabouts. Kelsie wasn’t giving anything up, especially with Jake’s imminent departure for the Omicron system. Things got heated, and Jake threatened to get the plans at any cost. We know from last season that Jake won’t hesitate to use the mind-control parasites he found, so I think this is heading in an awesome direction, for Jake at least.

Read more…

5 Ways the Star Wars Prequels were better than 4-6

I read this article in which the author attempts to defend the political shrewdness of Star Wars Episodes 1-3 over 4-6…

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http://movies.yahoo.com/news/why-star-wars-prequels-better-original-trilogy-160300514.html

which comes off like a debate student charged with defending an unpopular topic. He attempts to draw parallels between the post 9-11 world and the world of the prequels. As Phantom Menace came out in 1999, and Attack of the Clones was well in to production by the time 9/11 happened, this is a bit laughable.

But it got me to thinking: Is there any ground on which one COULD claim superiority of the Prequels?

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Sally Jenkins, Space Police Special Corp Major


Sally Jenkins slouched back in her chair. It had been a long day, and it wasn’t close to over. She had taken a lot of cheap shots on her way up the ladder, but you don’t get to be a major in the Space Police Special Corps without having a thick skin. She placed her Laser Blaster Pistol Gun on the desk, and dialed up a hot drink on the drinkenator.

Live Smackdown Video

Hey folks, Admin_Rock here. So you know how we talk about the Live Smackdown from time to time, but none of you have ever seen it? Well, hold on to your pants, or possibly the pants of a friend, because we have a 3 minute clip for the 2011 Comic Expo craftily edited by RobbieRobTown. (Video shot by the amazing Andrew Phung.)

WATCH! As we move through the bracket.
SEE! Admin_Rock get cut off a number of times.
MARVEL! At the Marvel of it.

Best Games of 2011

So Tomass rightly suggested that we run an article on our favorite games, video and otherwise. I like this suggestion a lot. Made me think long and hard about games and such, what I play and I what I don’t.

Best TV of 2011

Last week we covered the Best in Movies for 2011 (well, genre stuff, anyways). This week, we’ll look at some our favorite TV from 2011.

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I say we, in hopes that the other boys will pitch in as well.

Best Sci-Fi/Comic/Genre Film of 2011:Poll

Hey kids, Happy New Year and all that jazz. I’m back from vacation in Palm Springs and Mesa, and ready to get going for another year. I see everything went smoothly in my absence… What? No Action Smackdown Final?

Linking the poll at the bottom of the article. You should be able to vote for up to 3 items. If I missed any (pulled these off Wiki), let me know, I will add.

Polls

That’s coming this Friday, because I said so. In the meantime, thought we’d look back at the movies of 2011, and yap about those.

Merry Ho Ho

Because I love most of you, and tolerate others (and the Intern can suck it), here is a present.

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Walking Dead Discussion

Hey folks, we had a small discussion about The Walking Dead going on on the fb link, but I thought people might want to elaborate here a bit more, so …. talk away.

RULES: No comic book spoilers for events that haven’t occured.

Anything that has happened on the show is fair game.

Super late Karate Kid review

Admin-Rock here. As one of my hobbies is endlessly fiddling with plastic bricks, I tend to spend a lot of time sitting and building. As a result, I watch a LOT of TV and film. I mean a LOT. Seriously, hours and hours of it. Have a guess in your head as to how much… I’ll wait…. NO, WAY MORE then that.

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It gets to the point where sometimes I’ll watch things that even remotely catch my fancy. I decided to watch the recent Karate Kid remake with Jackie Chan and Jaden Smith. And though this ground has been well covered, I feel compelled to speak out, to warn others before it’s too late for them.

A Pause in the Smackdown to Remember

It occurs to Admin_Rock, as he sits at his computer this morning, that maybe posting a hypothetical gun battle to the death is not the best way to honour the fallen on Remembrance Day (Veteran’s Day for our American readers). So he’s unilaterally decided to postpone this week’s Smackdown entry to tomorrow. There aren’t a lot of things we get serious about here, this is one of them.

We will post this week’s chapter tomorrow.

NOT COOL.

Found this story by way of Josh Flanagan at ifanboy.com.

Basically, some douche who writes for Men’s Health and Maxim took some pics of people in costumes at the New York Comic Con, and made fun of them because they weren’t totally cut.

We here at the The Correctness do our fair share of mockery and castigation, but generally ours is well written and makes an effort. Buddy’s piece is just mean spirited and of crappy quality.

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The Correctness 2230: iPhone 134 launches this Bieberbay!

(Ed: This article was found in a copy of The Correctness magazine from RobbieRobTown’s trunk. His car can apparently travel through time, as the magazine is from the year 2230. We’ve presented it untouched.)

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Attention Ladies and Gentlemen and Unbeclarebs!!! Exciting news from the South, as the AppleOmniCorp announces the much awaiteb launch of the iPhone 134. Some of you out there were concerneb that this launch was going to be for the 133 G. Well, guess again! It’s a full flebged 134, complete with a grab bag of new features to make even the most bevout Morrisseyist brop it all and heab to the Glomomart!

ACTION SMACKDOWN: James Bond vs Ashley “Ash” Williams.

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ACTION SMACKDOWN!

This week: Still reeling from the clusterf#$k that was last week’s smackdown, we attempt to move forward. James Bond British Superspy takes on Ash Williams of the “Evil Dead” films.

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The rules are simple, and can be found HERE.

ACTION SMACKDOWN FRIDAY

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Hey kids. Smackdown will be up shortly. We’ve had a issue tracking down an opinion. Or… ah hell, we’ll blame Benji.

Eat Spaghetti, Fast Forward a Lot, Shack up with Javier Bardem

Last week, The Correctness decided to address a recurring complaint: “You guys never write stuff for women”. This is clearly false, as RobbieRobTown’s regular missives to specific women, and at least one issue of the Casting Couch will demonstrate. However, to be good and fair minded, we decided to address the situation. We looked to some of the biggest movie events aimed at women of the last few years, “Eat Pray Love” and “Sex and the City 2”, and decided to write a review.

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I previewed the first 3 minutes of “Sex and the City 2”, and found myself utterly unprepared. RobbieRobTown was in favour of “Eat Pray Love”. I warned him that it would likely contain at least 3 incidences of the Julia Roberts “bellowing laugh”, and that sometimes she’s capable of opening her mouth so wide, you feel compelled to move toward the screen in an attempt to walk into it, but he would not be swayed. And so it was that we sat down, notepads in hand, and began a journey that would last 32 hours. Or at least it seemed that long.

Action Smackdown Bracket

Okay, so we’ve posted the rules for the Action Smackdown HERE.

Here is the bracket for the 2011 Action Smackdown. Assume normal left/right matchups.

Action Smackdown Bracket

Action Smackdown Rules

With fall around the corner, it’s Smackdown time!

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In the past two years, The Correctness has brought you a Smackdown. Year One was the Superhero Smackdown, which was quite popular and contentious to some. Year Two was the Villains turn, and a bonus Team Smackdown. All of these were presented with tasty sidecards brought to you by RobbieRobTown.

So this year, we’ve decided to move the smackdown out of the comic book world, and on to the big screen. It’s Action Smackdown! pitting 16 of your favorite action heros/movie tough guys and gals against each other for the prize: bragging rights.

Memo from DC and Marvel

The Correctness has gotten its Dorito-dusted fingers on a couple of private memos from the Big Two in comics. Everyone is noticing the amount of press that Marvel had over its new Ultimate Spider-Man, who is half Latino, half African American. Seems like neither company can wait to switch up more characters.

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Read More….

San Diego Comic Con sucks.

Listen, I’m not one to bag on things… Okay, I’m TOTALLY one to do that, but seriously! I came down to San Diego this past weekend, went down to the Convention Center, expecting to get my geek on, and … it’s just terrible. There was no Marvel booth, no DC booth, no movie studios previewing […]

The Correctness Explains 2

A loooong time ago, we ran an article in which I endeavored to explain some complicated aspects of movie plots for the sake of our readers. It didn’t end well. It took a long time, and a lot of therapy, and the pain i feel when I think about it is much like the pain I feel from the box “papercut” I got from some printer boxes in the middle of the aisle at Best Buy this morning. (Seriously, big box stores, quit filling the ample aisle space with pallets of stuff. It’s annoying, and sometimes painful.)

So, I think I’m finally ready to try again, with the saved up mail from last time.

A Moment with the Red Skull

Saw Captain America last night. Very well done, a not so comic book-y comic book movie. Here’s a deleted scene from late in the film (No Spoilers).

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Overnerded?

I caught the trailer for “Cowboys and Aliens”, and watched a couple of genres collided head on. It didn’t exceedingly awesome, but I’m long past betting for or against films based on trailers made by marketing guys. It did get me thinking about summer blockbusters, and what gets put up on the screen.

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I’m pretty sure I’ve railed about this sort of thing before, but it does seem to me that as nerds/pop culture fanatics, we seem to be getting everything we want these days. The majority of summer films for the last few years have a comic book films, or sci-fi/fantasy. I’m not so sure it’s a good thing.

Live Appearance

The Correctness will be performing live this Saturday (July 16) at the special Hot Nuts and Popcorn show. We will be performing a skit that is very near and dear to our hearts. Hot Nuts is a great show, and the proceeds from the door are going to help out our buddy Derek pay some legal bills so that he can get back to New Zealand to be with his son. If you’re up to nothing, come on out, and make sure you say hi to us while you’re there!

Hot Nuts and Popcorn
Saturday July 16, 11pm
Loose Moose Theatre
Second floor of the Crossroads Market, 1235 – 26th Ave. S

Also, RobbieRobTown and Admin_Rock will be performing in the show immediately before that, an improvised show called Gorilla Theatre. Same location, 8pm.

A Case For “Dollhouse”

As part of our continuing service to you, The Correct, we continually find things for you to be in favour of. In our crazy, fast paced, webmanic society, it’s easy to miss something. Our “A Case For” series presents something (a TV show, film, Book, Band etc) that might deserve a look.

Our Cases are often presented by our regular readers, and we encourage that sort of behavior. If you have something you’d like to make a case for, write it up and send it to us at admin@thecorrectness.com . See the end of the article for more info.

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This week, we bring you A Case for “Dollhouse” brought to you by Admin_Rock.

Expansion!

The Correctness is expanding once again! Don’t worry folks, it’s not like a West Coast Avengers thing. We’ve added to our staff in a few ways. First off, our intrepid Cub Reporter Keith (@CubReporterK on twitter) has his own byline now, so you may be seeing a few more articles by him popping up.

In addition to that, The Correctness has agreed to take part in the Summer Intern program offered through Mount Royal University here in Calgary, and we’re pleased (maybe) to announce that we have our very own intern. Please welcome Benji Halverson (Intern_Benji) to The Correctness. He’ll be tasked with things like writing some “insider” articles, to give folks a feel for what things are like here in the office, as well as improving the air flow through the bullpen, and maybe sorting through the stacks of comics etc, and organizing things for us.

Welcome everyone!

Almost Heroes – Interview with Ryan Belleville

Admin Rock here: Today we have a special interview with Ryan Belleville, star of the new Showcase series “Almost Heroes”.

Almost Heroes poster

A Case For: Firefly

As part of our continuing service to you, The Correct, we continually find things for you to be in favour of. In our crazy, fast paced, webmanic society, it’s easy to miss something. Our “A Case For” series presents something (a TV show, film, Book, Band etc) that might deserve a look.

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Our Cases are often presented by our regular readers, and we encourage that sort of behavior. If you have something you’d like to make a case for, write it up and send it to us at admin@thecorrectness.com . See the end of the article for more info.
This week, we bring you A Case for “Firefly” brought to you by reader Fat American, with some editorial from us (the stuff in italics), as we also have strong feelings for this show.

Nerd Quiz: Asian and Native American Heroes

Hey kids, Admin_Rock here. Our intrepid cub reporter Keith was pondering over on facebook, as to the plight of minorities in comic books. It ended up being a fun trivia exercise, I thought I’d bring it over here.

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Keith asked “Nerds: List Asian comic characters who a) don’t know martial arts and b) don’t use a sword. Extra points if they were born in the US. The list is probably as long as native American characters who aren’t shamans.”

So, let’s hear it. Show us how extensive your comic book knowledge is.

Mini Mosaic

Admin Rock blabs about some LEGO thing he built over at Brickwares.

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Check it out over there.

A Case For: Iron Maiden

As part of our continuing service to you, The Correct, we continually find things for you to be in favour of. In our crazy, fast paced, webmanic society, it’s easy to miss something. Our “A Case For” series presents something (a TV show, film, Book, Band etc) that might deserve a look.

Our first installment “A Case For: Farscape” was presented by one of our regular readers, and we encourage that sort of behaviour. If you have something you’d like to make a case for, write it up and send it to us at admin@thecorrectness.com . See the end of the article for more info.

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This week, we bring you A Case for Iron Maiden, by reader El-ahrairah .

A Review of The Conspirators with an imaginary Robert Redford

Admin_Rock here. One of our regular contributors, cub reporter Keith brings us an exclusive interview with a completely made up Robert Redford. Enjoy!

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The Correctness at Calgary Comic and Entertainment Expo

Just a quick post to let our Calgary and Area fans that The Correctness will be making a rare live appearance at the Calgary Comic and Entertainment Expo this year. More info as it arrives, but at this point we’re anticipating doing a Live Smackdown.

Lost At Sea

RobbieRobTown is not just another pretty face. No. Nor is he simply the undisputed master of all things regards Radioactive Lanterns.

Robbeh
He is also a singer and songwriter. And, because you, The Correct, are so kind and loving and teeth-kicky to us, we’re rewarding you with a special preview of Rob’s newest song “Lost at Sea”. The critics say things like “Lyrics Admin_Rock would like”, and “Shiny”.

Listen within!

7 Tips for “Going Green”

Gas prices are on the rise, and the environment isn’t cleaning itself up. The Correctness feels your pain, and we’re here to help. Today, we present a list of tips and ideas for making your life and home more eco-friendly, so you can feel better about yourself, and help the earth a micro-smidge ( that’s a micro-touch to our American friends!!) while you’re at it!

Gas prices are on the rise, and the environment isn’t cleaning itself up. The Correctness feels your pain, and we’re here to help. Today, we present a list of tips and ideas for making your life and home more eco-friendly, so you can feel better about yourself, and help the earth a micro-smidge ( that’s a micro-touch to our American friends!!) while you’re at it!

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A Case For: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

As part of our continuing service to you, The Correct, we continually find things for you to be in favour of. In our crazy, fast paced, webmanic society, it’s easy to miss something. Our “A Case For” series presents something (a TV show, film, Book, Band etc) that might deserve a look.

Our first installment “A Case For: Farscape” was presented by one of our regular readers, and we encourage that sort of behaviour. If you have something you’d like to make a case for, write it up and send it to us at admin@thecorrectness.com . See the end of the article for more info.

This week, we bring you A Case For Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, brought to you by Correctness regular The M-Daddy.

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A Case For: The O.C.

As part of our continuing service to you, The Correct, we continually find things for you to be in favour of. In our crazy, fast paced, webmanic society, it’s easy to miss something. Our “A Case For” series presents something (a TV show, film, Book, Band etc) that might deserve a look.

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Who do you love?

The passing of Elisabeth Sladen yesterday got me thinking about Doctor Who, and it’s long and storied history.

While the current incarnation of the show seems to be going well, and bringing lots of viewers (new and old) to the fold, Sladen belonged to the old school Who. She was a companion to both John Pertwee’s Third Doctor and Tom Baker’s Forth Doctor.

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A Case For: Buffy The Vampire Slayer

As part of our continuing service to you, The Correct, we continually find things for you to be in favour of. In our crazy, fast paced, webmanic society, it’s easy to miss something. Our “A Case For” series presents something (a TV show, film, Book, Band etc) that might deserve a look.

Our first installment “A Case For: Farscape” was presented by one of our regular readers, and we encourage that sort of behaviour. If you have something you’d like to make a case for, write it up and send it to us at admin@thecorrectness.com . See the end of the article for more info.

This week, we bring you A Case For Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

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Minecraft

Cannot stop playing Minecraft. It is pure evil in computer game format.


(not mine…found on net)

Games like Dragon Age and Fallout, hell even Civilization think they’re all addictive and such, but they have no idea of the insidiousness that is tunneling through the darkness towards them.

I now fall asleep with stone bursting in my head, and the faint hissing sound of certain doom around the corner SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! respawn.

Daydream Nation

Hey folks. Sometimes we use The Correctness to self-promote, occasionally to curry favor with the rich and famous. Today, I use The Correctness to encourage you to go and see a film called Daydream Nation.

Why, you ask? Well, movies are awesome, and you can eat bags of popcorn bigger than your head. Why THIS movie, you ask, getting impatient with me?

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Summer Events

We’re heading towards summer, and to comic book fans, that always means a big old crossover. Sometimes, crossover events can be world changing issues of awesomeness, and sometimes, they can just be an excuse for crappy storylines that force readers to buy a ton of books they normally wouldn’t.

We put Crossover Events under the microscope, and see what comes up.

Further Milkitude

Our good friend Tomass over at Androgynous Kelly gave us his take on the recent propagation of Gandalf related goodness. Check out more in the post.

Response to the Gandalf Article

Over at Periannath.com, they’ve posted a wonderful article in response to our “10 reasons why Gandalf is a terrible wizard.”

Unlike the responses over at fark (which are usually much better, this time they felt unenthusiastic), they go beyond the “U R SUCK” level, and actually engage in a debate about the topic, adding some reasons why Gandalf is a great wizard.

Thus, in the spirit of debate and discourse, we implore you to head over and read

10 Reasons Why Gandalf is The Greatest Wizard Evar

10 Reasons why Gandalf is a terrible wizard

Admin_Rock isn’t one to stand on ceremony or suffer fools lightly. He says what he thinks, and he’s Correct. Today, 10 reasons why Gandalf is a terrible wizard. What’s that? You thought he was an awesome wizard? Put the bong down, turn off the Pink Floyd, and step into the current decade. School is now in session.

A Case For: Babylon 5

As part of our continuing service to you, The Correct, we continually find things for you to be in favour of. In our crazy, fast paced, webmanic society, it’s easy to miss something. Our “A Case For” series presents something (a TV show, film, Book, Band etc) that might deserve a look. This week we bring you the awesome Babylon 5.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I submit to you that Babylon 5 was one of, if not THE, greatest science fiction shows of our time. Now, I know you’re thinking “Didn’t you write a list of 35 reasons Babylon 5 rules?” Yes. Well, sort of. But this time, i’m all serious and junk.

Screw Paper

Found this on cSlacker.com today, made me laugh. I though you all might enjoy it. If anyone out there knows who created this, let us know.

Closing Time: Listen Up

It’s no secret that here at The Correctness, we are a very literate bunch. We’re interested in things literary, words of all kinds. Normally, this isn’t a problem, apart from the always being right and constantly having to correct language choices.

The song that’s been in my mind lately, is “Closing Time” by Semisonic. It’s always been a favorite of mine, not because it’s very catchy, but because it has some very interesting phrasings. The one that always stick out is

I might be done with Star Wars

A strange thing happened recently: The announcement for the Blu-Ray version of the Star Wars films left me completely bored. It’s a curious reaction, consider that since I saw the original movie in the theatre at the ripe old age of 6, I’ve been a huge fan. I remember going with my mom to Sears to buy action figures, some of which I still have (sans lightsabers and capes).

I showed up in the theatre for the re-release of the Special Editions, and was insanely happy about news and previews of Phantom Menace. I saw all three of the “new” movies in the theatre as well. I can argue with the best of them over plot points and logic, and even tried to read some of the expanded universe books. (Sorry, couldn’t do it. I have standards when it comes to novels). Hell, our website even has a special category for Star Wars.

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Poll Results: Best Comic Book Movie 2010

The Correctness 2010 Comic Book Movie Poll results are out, and you picked Scott Pilgrim as your favorite.


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Letter to a Woodcutter

Dear Mr. Woodcutter,

I am writing to you seeking compensation for damages to my property and myself, stemming from events of two weeks ago. As you’re no doubt aware, your children, finding themselves lost in the woods, took it upon themselves to vandalize a modern art installation I was working on in the darkest part of the forest. Not that you would be concerned, but my goal was to show the juxtaposition of the innocence and color of candy with the bleakness of the forest.

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Insult Contest Winner

So, at the beginning of the Superteam Smackdown (which you can find up at the top under the Smackdown tag), we declared a comment insult contest. The deal was that whomever insulted us the best would receive a Correctness T-Shirt. Now, you, the reading public, would have no way to know the following

1) It was Tbinns and RobbieRobTown that decided to give away a Correctness t-shirt as the prize.
2) The only person who has ever made Correctness t-shirts is katewares (mrs admin_rock).
3) Tbinns and RobbieRobTown, for all their comedic brilliance and wit, have the follow through of a 7 year old with ADHD in a room full of toys.

99 Problems, but a Brick ain’t one.

Hey there. In addition to not destroying The Correctness website too often, I also moonlight as a Lego freak… Thought you guys might like to see some of my stuff from 2010. I go by Brickwares at my other website (www.brickwares.com).

Things to give a RobbieRobTown

So, when people say they can’t find the right gift for someone, it usually means either they can’t be arsed to put in the effort, or they’re just not thinking. Cuz there’s always something…

Case in point, RobbieRobTown. My wife (katewares) is really, really good at this game. Whenever Xmas rolls around, she always seems to have a brilliant idea for what we can give Uncle Robtown (as he’s known in our home.)

Congrats Tbinns

A quick note to wish everyone a happy new year, and to send Tbinns and Mrs Tbinns our warmest wishes on the arrival of their first child, Baby boy Tbinns. Rest up Tbinnses. The rest of you, click on the Amazon link and buy things so lil’ Tbinns can have shoes and a lightsaber when […]

Thoughts on Star Wars

Check out this article by Javier Grillo-Marxuach over at i09.com. It’s well written, insightful, and sums up many of my thoughts about Star Wars, and Nerd Culture in general. The growing interest in geek.nerd culture, indeed, it’s mainstreaming through things like “The Big Bang Theory” and the success of superhero films means that things once hidden and inside are now everywhere.

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Obsessive Babylon 5 viewing

admin_rock here, with a special Correctness article. A while back, we posted an article: 35 reasons to watch Babylon 5. And it is. No question. The comments thread was fun filled and interesting, and one of our regular readers “Keith”, mentioned the following:

“I share the love of the last of the Babylon stations.

My biggest and geekiest pop culture project was completed last month – I viewed/read every canonical B5 thing in chronological order. 113 episodes, 7 movies, 11 books, 6 short stories, 11 comics, 3 unshot episode scripts.

I have yet to find a publisher for the annotated viewing notes.”

This intrigued us (well, me) and Keith was kind enough to send us an excerpt, which we now provide for your reading pleasure.

Lose 50 pounds in a month the Correctness Way!

Weight loss is all the rage, both here on the net and in real life too! With all the processed, sugar rich foods in the world, and the abundance of fast food, it’s no surprise.

A new book by Tim Ferriss, “The Four Hour Body”, claims to show you how to shed all that unwanted fat by doing things like eating after you wake up, putting icepacks on your neck, and taking cold showers. It also will show you how to prevent fat gain while bingeing, how to increase fat-loss 300% with a few bags of ice and how Tim gained 34 pounds of muscle in 28 days, without steroids, and in four hours of total gym time.

Now you can unlock the secrets of the Correctness Weight Loss program!

Alan Moore: big scary guy what writes good

After a number of polls checking your opinion on matters less important, we decided to find out how comic book geeky our comic book geeks are.

So we asked what your favorite Alan Moore graphic novel/trade was. We were a little surprised at the winner:

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Poll Results: Who SHOULD have won Team Smackdown

So, like a bad issue of “What If” (and really, most issues were bad), we tried to imagine a world where the Team Smackdown was won by someone other than the X-Men. We left it to you, The Correct, to decide. And you spoke, clearly, loudly, and with no regard for conformity!

You chose… RobbieRobTown. I’ll leave it to him to come up with the narrative of how he beat the X-Men, but I suspect it has something to do with Marmalade, and Kitty Pryde. Or possibly Kitty Pryde in Marmalade, with no one else around. Either way, I’m reserving an early copy.

See more results …

John Byrne is back?

Found this article over at First Comic News, about the relaunch/continuation of John Byrne’s Next Men. The Correctness are clearly caught in the late 80’s comic-wise, and John Byrne is as close as you get to a Demigod of comics at that time.

Now, the real question is, will this be a triumphant return, or will it turn in to another (shudder) X-Men Forvever.

Hey Claremont, you know what your book is missing?

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Johnny Depp: Attention Whore or not?

Okay, so over at Fark, there’s a thread discussing the merits of Johnny Depp, and an assertion has been made that he’s an attention whore. This seems ludicrous to me, as the guy is known for avoiding attention, and doing all kinds of charitable deeds like visiting Children’s Hospitals as Jack Sparrow.

More than just rehashing that argument, I’m interested in what our readers think in general, so why not start with Johnny Depp?

I’m curious as to what The Correct have to say. (oh, that’s YOU, by the way. I just came up with that.)

Sound off.

35 Reasons to Watch Babylon 5

Babylon 5 was easily one of the best, no, THE best science fiction show ever to have graced TV. I know you Trekkies are crapping bricks right now, deciding whether to scroll to the end and argue with me immediately, or whip out your notebooks to jot down each point you wish to argue.

But it’s true. It kicks ass in every possible way. Better story. Better story arcs. Better writing. Better ships. Better battles. I could go for days, and based on the title of this article, I probably will.

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Leslie Nielsen: The Correctness Obit

The Correctness is sad to inform you that comedy great Leslie Nielsen passed away last night. He was 28 years old.

Nielsen was born and raised in Canada, though this didn’t seem to adversely affect his career. His father worked for the Royal Canadian Mounted Police, and thus, Nielsen spent a lot of time moving around, town to town, up and down the dial. And while you and he were never meant to be, baby, think of him once in a while.

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Poll Results: Best New Avengers Show/Film

A while back, in honor of the Avengers appearance in the Team Smackdown, as well as their relaunch as Marvel’s darlings of the decade, we asked you which new Avengers property you liked he best…

Read on to see what our reader chose.

Team Smackdown: The Final… Avengers vs. X-Men

Time for some Superteam Smackdown, live from the The Correctness’s new Herodome, located in sunny downtown Newville. The tailgates are up, the beer is cold, the snacks are carby, it’s time for some smackdown! We have 8 classic superhero teams fighting it out to see who can claim the title.

This week It’s the Final! The Mighty Avengers vs. The X-men. Two titans of of the superteam genre, more titanic even than the Thunderbolts, who suck a bunch.

The fight is on!

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Replay: Wanted

I’ve been watching a LOT of movies lately. Maybe it’s the cold weather keeping me in the house, maybe it’s because I’m working from home more often, maybe it’s because I’ve caught up on my Summer viewing. I’m not sure, and you’re not that concerned.With unlimited PVR space and the 30,000 channel pack, there’s a lot of films that I’ll record for later, and some i’ll even watch.

At any rate, a fews days back, I watched Wanted for the second time. I remember my first impression of the movie was that it was just okay. The whole bullet-curving thing was weird, and Morgan Freeman didn’t quite fit, and it was all a bit gaudy and eye roll worthy. Yet something made me give it a second look. And I’m glad I did.

An Open Letter to K1LLR478

Dear K1LLR478:

I’m writing you to express my distaste for how you handled our encounter in Call of Duty 4 this past Tuesday evening. Yes, I admit that you managed to sneak behind me and kill me with a single shot. However, I think it was both inappropriate and disrespectful to grind your avatar’s crotch on my corpse’s face, while calling me a name.

Call of Duty Trash Talk

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EXCLUSIVE! Marvel’s titles/plotlines for 2011.

Here at The Correctness, we have access to all kinds of information that the common man is unable to access. Yes, ALL KINDS. We have spies, moles, quislings, carrier pigeons, and heavyset dudes with cameraphones parked out in strategic locations.

All of this so we can bring you breaking comic news as it happens. Today’s exclusive, the plotlines from Marvel comics for the year 2011. Read on, True Believer!

AVENGERS: With the recent reformation of the Avengers following Dark Reign, Marvel has introduced a number of books:

Legend of Zelda Movie: Don’t Get Your Hopes Up.

(ED: Today’s article is brought to you by guest writer Victoria Banner – no relation.)

Legend of Zelda: The Movie.

So somewhere at one point in time someone said to me “A Legend of Zelda Movie would be awesome” I disagreed with this fact but was too busy not being sober to bring up why I whole heartedly disagreed with this fact.

Well I forgot who brought up the concept, but I remembered why a legend of Zelda movie would be Terrible.

War of the Worlds Lego Mosaic

I debuted my latest piece at Seattle’s BrickCon this weekend: “War of the Worlds” (More on the mosaic in another article to come). For the second year in a row, I was awarded the “Best Mosaic” trophy, and even received some votes for “Best in Show”. Seattle and admin_rock seem to get along very well!

More pics within…

Poll Results: T-Shirts

We asked you, the Rabid Faithful, how you felt about having a whole lot of RobbieRobTown chaffing your nipples. You were, understandably, concerned. Then we told you it was only in T-Shirt form. You were still reluctant, but after a few Hard Lemonades, you agreed.

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To Doctor Josef Nefario

To Doctor Josef Nefario, head of Applied Interglobal Industries, Sept 12, 2008:

Dr Nefario, I’m writing you to inform you that payment is past due for our recent renovations to your Los Angeles office. We had agreed on strict terms, due to the nature of the alterations, which our office strongly advised against. In addition, on our post install visit, our quality control assistant Barry noted that you had failed to apply for the appropriate relaxations and permits, as you had stated you would. Normally, our office would handle these matters, but you were very insistent on this matter.

Open Letter to the 15 year old with the Run DMC T-shirt

Dear 15 year old with the Run DMC T-shirt:

I saw you this morning, while I was driving my 6 year old to school. You had the usual teenage attire: Weird looking hoodie, straight leg jeans, and skate shoes.

All of this is a-ok, and normal. In fact, you wouldn’t have even registered on my radar, except for the fact that you had on a RUN DMC T-shirt. Now, i’ll spare you the old guy “It was 1 degree C at the time, you should probably do up that hoodie”, and we’ll skip straight to this:

Nerd Fight II Return of the Outrage

Hey Folks, admin_rock here. It’s come to my attention that it’s been a long time since we armed you with any new ammo for causing nerds to fight and argue. And really, it’s so very pleasing to sit back and let them have at, guaranteed entertainment for the entire evening, IF YOU DO IT RIGHT. Any ham-fisted, slack jawed noob can throw out a “Heroes Sucks”; and to be fair, that wouldn’t start a fight, so much as a tacit agreement amongst everyone in the room.

So, here’s a few more to keep your nights lively! Keep in mind, you don’t actually have to agree with the statment. It’s effect will be that of throwing a big meaty bone into Michael Vick’s living room. (ed: Michael Vick is Football player. He was arrested for being involved in a dog fighting ring.) (ed: Football is a “Sport”.)

Don’t worry, we’ll walk you through these slowly.

An Open Letter from Katy Perry’s breasts

To Whom it May Concern:

Listen, we know you’re looking at us. We get it. We’re on the big side, as far as breasts go. Along with Katy’s eyes, we represent most of the oversized stuff on her. And certainly, we’ve helped her get to where she is today. Our presence requires her to build up her lung capacity, and makes it easy for her to get meetings with agents and record producers.

Reader’s Choice: The Best of The Correctness Year One

A few weeks back, we asked you, minions denizens people at work with seriously nothing better to do oh faithful readers, to chime in and let us know which articles were your favorites. You remember: It was this article.

Well, to our continued amazement, you responded. Here then, are your top three favorite Correctness Articles from Year One. (Capitalized to be all Frank Miller cool.)

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Poll Result: I’m

The “I’m” poll revealed more about you than you wanted revealed. Oh, I know, you thought you were just casually clicking on a little radio button, but it was SOOOOO much more than that.

We know, for instance, for all your talk of how Frank Miller has gone off the rails, or how his work is decreasing in quality…

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Poll Results: Why You Gotta Be Like That?

Baby, I don’t why you’re getting all bent out of shape. This morning you were all smiles and sunshine. Now, you’re tearing a strip off me, and you won’t tell me why. What? I should already KNOW why you’re mad? Awwww, baby, don’t play me like that that!

What? Really? Daaaaaaaaaamn. Why didn’t you say so?

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New Comment Policy

Effective nowish, comments will not be posted if they’re filled with hate, trolling, or just plain stupid. We’re ALL for creative and funny vulgarity, and clever arguments. You can call RobbieRobTown anything your heart desires, as long as you do it above a grade 9 level. So, something like this “Because the flash cant see […]

Year One: By the Numbers

This article is for the statistic hounds amongst you, as well as those of you gambling about the site (?!).


POSTS: 306

COMMENTS: 1549

Most Posts: TBINNS 129

Pageviews: 651,179

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POLL RESULTS: Han Solo vs Indy!

This week we explored a different (though in many ways familiar) tack. The poll question pitted Han Solo vs Indiana Jones, in a fistfight.

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No More Heroes Already

It’s no secret that I’m a big fan of superheros, and comic books. Also, love going to movies. But I’ve come to a conclusion, one that might seem incredulous or shocking on the surface: Hollywood needs to stop making superhero movies.


(Scapulaman, possibly the next big superhero film?)

Maybe not entirely, but 94% of the projects in development should just be scrapped. No Avenger, No Iron Man 3, No Thor, No Spider-Man 4. No prequels, no origin stories, nothing. We’ll let the 3rd Dark Knight movie go ahead, but after that, let’s ban them from Hollywood for another 5 years or so.

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The Tale of SEO Jenkins

“I wonder if Bono and U2 are going on tour this summer”, thought Jeff Jenkins, while checking out his new iPad. He hadn’t been sleeping well, and was trying to find ways to help fall asleep. So far, he’d been forced to scroll through a number of articles about naturally increasing the size of your penis, to his chagrin.


“Enough of this”, he declared. “I don’t give a damn whether or not Paris Hilton is hanging out with Justin Bieber, or whether the rumors about Conan O’Brien getting a new show are true or not. I’m going out for a nice, relaxing run, followed by some hot yoga.”

IRON MAN 2 Poll Results

Our Iron Man 2 comes to a close, and the Readers have spoken! Err … clicked!

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Open Letter to Generation Y

Dear Generation Y, or more specficially, those of you who work the drive-thru window:

Shut the f#%k up. Seriously. Ask me what I want, and then, here’s the tricky part: SHUT. THE. F#%K. UP. Wait, and actually listen while I tell you what I want to order.

I know you’re all special, and unique, and a pretty snowflake, and beautiful in every single way, but neither of us is getting anywhere faster if you keep interrupting me…

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Sorry for the Delay

Hey Folks. We’re finally back up and running. We apologize for the interruption, and could give you a long list of reasons as to why it happened, but we’ll stick to 1) admin_rock is not as smart as he thinks he is. 2) See 1 We’ve recovered our data from mid-January back, and will be […]

Open Letter To Seth McFarlane

(Note: This is a repost of the original). Dear Seth, I am a big fan of your show (note the singular there. American Dad just okay…and we will not discuss the Cleveland show.) and watch it as often as I can. You seem to be under some sort of internet backlash at the moment where […]

Fashion Affliction

I recently spent a weekend at the West Edmonton Mall, home of various lemurs, waterslides, and aging amusement park rides. While each of those things is worthy of much attention, the thing that was consistently evident was this: Men’s fashion is in a dire state of affairs. I’m talking worse than the 70’s. Worse than […]

The Stylistic and Situational Paradox of Meaning and Intent: Ke$ha’s Tik Tok.

(Note: This is a repost of the original).

The Correctness has been lax in it’s duty to our readers lately. We’ve been ignoring your need for some serious literary discussion and parsing of ludicrous pop songs. In order to alleviate this, we present an in-depth look at a song by a woman with a dollar sign in her name.


Wake up in the morning feeling like P Diddy

A bold beginning, bringing the listener straight into the action, with little or no preparation. Our subject is awake, and having an emotional reaction. However, we’re uncertain what that reaction is, as, in order to understand the simile, we’re forced to have a general understanding of how P Diddy feels, or alternately, what aspect of P Diddy the subject is meant to be emulating. Curious, a riddle presented in the opening. Perhaps this will evolve through the narrative to be important.

Dear 24

(Note: This is a repost of the original).

Dear 24:

I never thought we’d get to the place where I would have to do this, but I’m breaking up with you. It shouldn’t come as much of a shock, we’ve barely seen each other in the last year or so, and neither of us seem every interested in staying together. Between my lackluster interest in you, and your refusal to change, or try anything other than the same old tired tricks, well, it’s inevitable.

When we first got together, I was in awe of you. Your smart, choppy style, your boundary pushing narrative devices, the way you showed me what everyone was doing the last few seconds of each hour. And when our second year together started, I was shocked at the ferocity you showed.

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Dear Waitress at the Chinese Buffet

(Note: This is a repost of the original)

While I applaud your eagerness, it’s okay for my water glass to have more than two sips missing before refilling it.

Also: The fortune cookies should return to telling “fortunes”. Telling me things about myself does NOT count.

Caution: May Cause Side Effects

While perusing through an issue of Tiger Beat Entertainment Weekly, which we extended our subscription to weeks before we noticed that it no longer cared about anything entertaining, we found an ad for a drug that claims to help you stop smoking. While The Correctness is 100% non-smoking, we noticed the ad itself was a full page, but the warnings and information for the drug took up no less than a two page spread. Amongst the usual info, we saw some pretty crazy stuff.

Remember, this is for a drug meant simply to help you stop smoking.

click to continue

Busting a Move

Dear Young M.C. :

RE: “Your best friend Harry has a brother Larry, and in five days from now he’s going to marry. He’s hoping you can make it, if you can, ’cause in the ceremony you’ll be the best man.”

Are we to assume that it is Harry that is going to marry? This makes more sense than the alternative, in which you are the Best Man at your best friend’s brother’s wedding. In that hypothesis, one would think Harry himself a more likely candidate. But, no, we need to assume that it is your best friend Harry whom is to wed.

Luke Skywalker: Chosen One or Sociopath?

Today, The Correctness takes a closer look at Luke Skywalker, whom many have lauded as a hero, both for his role in ending the grip of the Galactic Empire, as well as playing an important role in the Prophesy of Restoring Balance to the Force. However, there is another side to this mysterious youngster, one which we’d like to shed some light upon.

Read More ….

The Friends of Anakin Skywalker

ED: The Correctness obtained copies of these interviews, found in a box addressed to “The Correctness: A Long Time from Now, In a Galaxy Far,Far, Away”.

In Defence of Violence in Video Games

There’s been a lot of talk in the media about the negative impacts of video games. How they cause violent behavior, make people more likely to snap and start executing those around them.

We at The Correctness present this reminder of the importance of playing video games. For without them, our world would have been destroyed long ago.

A Look Back at the Past

The Correctness likes to take a pause every once in a while to look back and see what things were like, how the past gets us to where we are now. Today’s installment comes from admin_rock, who brings us a sentimental look back at a time we like to call “1 to 2 pm today”.

Attention!

If you use the term “Party Cardi” out loud, we will seriously come after you and take a massive handful of sand, and pound it up your ass. Unless you like that sort of thing. In which case, we won’t!

H1 – Flames 2

(ED: Normally, The Correctness avoids direct commentary on matters of a political nature, as we feel our audience understands that most politicians are dummies, but in this case we couldn’t resist.)

According to the media, The Calgary Flames players,staff, and families were able to arrange a private clinic to receive H1N1 vaccinations, while the unwashed masses had to line up, and are now waiting for clinics to re-open. We might be able to understand this if they had a bunch of appointments to show off the Stanley Cup, but that hasn’t been a problem for 2 decades.

Hooray, were immune to H1N1
Hooray! We’re Immune!

Click to Read More

The Correctness Archives 1910 – Hand Washing is Government Propoganda

(ED: Today’s article comes from our vast archives. This originally appeared in the July 1910 issue of The Correctness.)

The Correctness is concerned about health issues, as we all are. With all this talk about Hand Washing, we’ve decided to get to the bottom of the issue, to help you avoid any confusion.

CLAIM: Hand Washing can kill germs that make us sick.

We’re not ones to hop on a band-wagon, but there seems to be some validity to this. Earlier this year, Dr. Josephine Baker began program in New York City to educate child care workers about hygiene issues like hand washing. Opponents to her program are claiming that such measures are reducing the need for doctors and health care, and that such a thing will cause a lack of illnesses.

We decided to speak to many of these indidivuals, to hear their complaints. Here is what they had to say:

Things that won’t help with the H1N1 Virus

The Correctness has seen a lot of stupid things in its day, but few more stupid than the recent spate of “alternative remedies” which purport to make you immune to H1N1. Things like “wash your hands”,”gargle with salt water”, and “drink oil of oregano”. Washing your wands is a great practice, and gargling with salt water makes your throat feel nice, they won’t increase your body’s immunity to an airborne virus. Many people are claiming that the H1N1 vaccine is “untested and rushed”. We’re assuming that these same people can point us to the Lanset Journal article on the double-blind study on the efficacy of Oil of Oregano. Well, we’re waiting…

In light of this, here are some other things that won’t raise your immunity level.

Click to Read More

Joss, it’s time to leave TV behind.

It’s no secret that The Correctness are big fans of Joss Whedon. He’s made a string of shows that are brilliant, funny, and engaging. We watched Buffy (movie and show), We watched Angel. We loved the hell out of Firefly and Serenity. We crushed on Dr Horrible. We (well, at least some of we) really dig Dollhouse. But Joss, buddy, we need to talk about how the networks (we’re mostly looking at you, Fox!) treat you.

A Love Letter to “Big Trouble in Little China”

Dear Big Trouble in Little China:

It’s been a a year or two since we were together last, but my love for you is still as strong as that day in 1986 when we first met. I loved you then, and I love you now. But it’s easy to say these things. Let me tell you why I love you.

Haiku for a Monday

In our continuing attempts at increasing the Correctness of every day life, we present this artistic offering of daily life.

The Final Diary of Sir Desmond Rothschild

(ED: The following is a series of excerpts from the final diary of the world famous explorer, Sir Desmond Rothschild, written during his final assault on the North Pole, in 1912)

Day 3: The expedition is off to a ruddy good start. The men are feeling bullish, the food is plentiful, and we’ve hired a dozen of the finest Himalayan Sherpas to support our effort. In addition, we’ve brought a dozen of the most surefooted Chilean mules. Nothing can stop us from reaching the pole in record time.

Gerald and the Sea

the sea

Gerald McAfferty had a very normal life. He was a claims adjuster, for a large insurance company. He lived in Ohio, and had never left the state. When he finished high school, with near perfect grades, he went immediately to university. After he completed his degree, he was hired directly to the job which he held to this day. He lived alone, in a one bedroom apartment, and ate his lunch all alone every day. Life was quite predictable for Gerald, until his 31st birthday. Soon after that forgettable day, Gerald heard the call of the sea for the first time.

Of DOOM!!!!

shirley temple

Whenever someone at your table orders a Shirley Temple, you should immediately follow it up with “Of DOOM!!!!”.

(Note: This is not funny with a Roy Rogers, and is particularly pleasing when someone orders a “Sex on the Beach”.)

The Lexus redundancy

The economy of language is important to us at The Correctness. For instance, there is no need to say something like “The guy in the Lexus is driving like a douchebag.” You can simply point, and say “Lexus”. The rest is implied.

The FM Transmitter Quandry

I wonder why is it that when some other car`s iPod transmission takes over my own, they`re always listening to something very, very shitty.

NERD FIGHT!

Here at The Correctness, we deal in things nerdish. Also geekish and Pointdexterish, but mainly nerdish. And if there’s one things nerds can do better than most, it’s arguing about minutia. (Also math, computers, biology, chemistry, botany, etc).

Nerds

Some of you out there are thinking, “so friggin what”. And you’re right. But just for a moment, consider the endless entertainment appeal of watching the little guys get really, really worked up about nothing, with the calming knowledge that if they get out of hand, you can easily subdue all of them, regardless of the numbers involved. Read more …

Guess the Nouns

Paula Abdul apparently quit Idol via Twitter. Guess which 3 nouns in that sentence we don’t give a fuck about.

Julie and Julia

In theatres Aug 7, the story of Julia Child and her efforts to break into cooking, and some modern chick who decides to cook all of Julia’s recipes and write a blog about it.

Wait. We’re supposed to watch a movie about a chick with a blog? about cooking?

A personal note to the fucktard to sat in front of me at the Folk Festival

Dear Fucktard: (and I call you that not because I don’t know your name, but because you’re a fucktard.)

I just wanted to drop you a little line to let you know where your behavior strayed from socially acceptable boundaries. I suspect the first strike was when you thought “Gee, I’ll just wander in here and insinuate myself in a space far too small for my giant chairs. Hmm, right on the very front edge of this blanket seem right, that should make it impossible for the guy who waited in line for hours to see”.

7 things you should already know about flying cars.

flying-car-new

(Editor’s Note: This article was taken from a copy of “The Correctness” Magazine, June 3020 edition. It was found in the trunk of Rob’s car, after he took some type of time-related trip)

As you well know, Flying Cars have now been around since 2984, but it seems strange to The Correctness that many of you out there still haven’t mastered the basics of driving them. Here are a few simple guidelines that will keep us all safely flying.

Quandry

Should I buy the soundtrack of Transformers 2 on itunes, or just jab scissors in my eyes?

Ode to the douchebag on the dirt bike driving around my neighborhood at 11 pm

Unknown warrior,
He who doth not yield to the chains of life.
You who know not when to say “die”.
Pushing further and further into the night,
You touch the throttle, and fling yourself
into destiny.

I, who can only stand still, and watch.
I, voiceless, wait furtively.
I turn my face to the pale moon, and
silently
call to you in vain

“It’s 11 o’clock at night. Stop driving repeatedly down the street,
You fucktard.”

The Correctness Explains

movie_camera

The Correctness has been receiving a fair amount of e-mail looking for clarifications and understand about plot points in famous films. We, as always, are correct, and aim to spread understanding in these cases. Let us begin.

Dear Correctness,

Was the gun that Edward Norton’s character uses at the end of Fight Club real, or was it imaginary like Tyler Durden?

Jim in Brooklyn

Why you should skip the new Harry Potter movie.

Because you’re a grown up, and it’s based on a book for 12 year olds. (See also “Transformers”, “Twilight”, and “The DaVinci Code”)

The Love Song of J. Xander Douchebag

I grow old… I grow old… I shall wear the bottom of my Gap denims rolled. Shall I spike my hair up high, Do I dare to eat a Dragonfruit, I shall wear Old Navy Capris, and walk upon the beach. I have heard the Jonas Brothers singing, each to each I do not think […]

The Pocket Length Continuum

Ladies: If the length of the pocket on your jean shorts is longer than the material itself, you are a whore.

Television Blanding

The Correctness came across this article bemoaning the state of cable television. Since television is close to our heart, and we fully agree with everything the article says, we’re linking here for your pleasure. Also, there’s a delicious amount of irony in the fact that rather than generate new content on this subject, we’re simply […]

Indy 5: A Good Idea?

Ask most die hard fans their opinion of Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, and you’re likely to get some sneering, some scoffing, and some laughter. For my dollar, there hasn’t been an Indiana Jones film I haven’t wanted to see, and I’ll be there for a fifth chapter. The critical reaction to Crystal Skull was […]