Open Letter to the 15 year old with the Run DMC T-shirt
Dear 15 year old with the Run DMC T-shirt:
I saw you this morning, while I was driving my 6 year old to school. You had the usual teenage attire: Weird looking hoodie, straight leg jeans, and skate shoes.
All of this is a-ok, and normal. In fact, you wouldn’t have even registered on my radar, except for the fact that you had on a RUN DMC T-shirt. Now, i’ll spare you the old guy “It was 1 degree C at the time, you should probably do up that hoodie”, and we’ll skip straight to this:
“What the hell are you doing wearing a RUN DMC T-shirt?” Nothing else in your appearance expressed a 80’s retro vibe, nor did you dress like a fan of Hip Hop in any way. You’re 15, so when they were at the top of the game, you were minus 9 years old. In fact, you were only 2 when “Crown Royal” came out, and that was waaaay past the sell by date. I’m cool with you digging their songs, they had a lot of great stuff back in the 80’s.
So it comes down to this.
1)You’re wearing the shirt to profess your love for the Kings from Queens, which makes you awesome. If this is the case, throw out those stupid looking jeans, and get something loose and big. And get rid of the skate shoes, or at the VERY LEAST, make sure they’re old school Adidas.
2)you’re wearing it “ironically”, which makes you the worst kind of person in the world. Hey hipsters, here’s a tip: The only people wearing something ironically are knights in the middle ages, or possibly Iron Man. You’re just fucktarded. Take off the stupid trucker hats, shave, and lose the air of superiority that you decided one day you’d like to have.
In closing, RUN DMC is awesome, but only for the right reasons. Embrace the coolness, or stop wearing the shirt.
Admin Rock.
