Too Old for this Shit: The Diary of an Eldery Nerd
(Note: This is a repost of the original). I believe the topic of aging has been brought up in this forum before. I myself turned 40 in October. I don’t feel aged. Apart from my asthma. Oh, and arthritic and gout ridden feet. and my back issues. But apart from that I am spry as can be. On the way into work today, I stopped at a pedestrian crossing where a very attractive young lady in an extraordinarily tight shirt was crossing in...
Smackdown: AWESOME UNDERCARD! Daedalus vs. Gargamel vs. Gamera
We here at The Correctness have listened to our fans, and we know we couldn’t design a superhero or supervillain smackdown to please everyone. In fact, we couldn’t design an article to please everyone, and I particularly can’t please anyone with anything for any reason. Mind you, somebody decided to make the film “Extreme Ops”, so I don’t know how any human could be pleased with that either.
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Overly Honest Burger Advertising Quandry
Dear Local Restaurant/Lounge: I drove past your street sign the other day, its flourescent letters still arranged in their original message- a tantalizing offering to the urban teens with time to spare. How many words contain the necessary letters for “Ass Rods on Your Nuts”, I wonder? In any case, your sign, confoundingly, said the following: “We have one of the best burgers in town!” Where do I begin? If you had simply claimed to...
Requiem For Airplane
(Note: This is a partial repost of the original). The recent passing of Peter Graves has, like many of our readers I’m sure, brought up fond memories of the movie Airplane, and of course how great he was in that movie It occurs to me that as much as they may TRY and replicate it, Hollywood consistently misses the mark....
Fashion Affliction
I recently spent a weekend at the West Edmonton Mall, home of various lemurs, waterslides, and aging amusement park rides. While each of those things is worthy of much attention, the thing that was consistently evident was this: Men’s fashion is in a dire state of affairs. I’m talking worse than the 70’s. Worse than the 80’s. Makes the flannel of the 90’s seem like a 3 piece suit. The ratio of awfulness...
Music That Makes Me Instantly Happy
You know those mornings where you wake up and the sun is shining, the birds are singing, everyone walks with a spring in their step and a smile, and you would STILL punch a girl scout in the throat if she tried to sell you some cookies? Some days you can’t help it, no matter what the day is shaping up like, you are in a bad mood. You just want to scream at everyone, be belligerent to people, and call them idiots if they don’t agree...