“Stopping by the Woods to Poop on a Summer’s Eve” by R. Frost
I stopped by the woods on a warm summers eve,
By a mending wall drenched in sun.
And deep in my bowels, from odours so foul,
Twas time that I baked a fresh bun.
Public Health Emergency Advice
The Correctness received this impassioned plea for wisdom a few days after the close of our contest, but we felt it warranted special attention, due to the serious public health concerns:
Dear Correctness,
Could you please help me and my friend with a problem we are having. As residents of South East Asia, it has come to our attention that many people are afraid of contracting H1N1. This in itself is annoying, as the current strain of the virus appears to be as terrifying as dermatitis, and quite a lot less irritating.
Time Travel FAQs Part 1: Folding Time
… Q: A popular technique for time travel that I often hear discussed is “folding time”. How does folding time help to travel through time?
A: Well, it’s a simple as this: Imagine time is this piece of paper (Rob holds a piece of paper). Now imagine we could do this (Rob bends the paper to touch in a couple of places) so we could pass from one point in time to another. Well time travel is not at all like that. It’s more like if I did that paper bending thing, except with time instead of paper. Paper is more like paper than it is like time, it’s just serving as a physical analogue in this case. Like, I guess you could create similes about how paper is like time, but why bother?…
See full text for instructions…
Show me the Monet
(The following is a true account of Correctness correspondent TBinns and his bride on their honeymoon as they tackle the Met in New York City. Between this and his recent Shakespeare post, we feel he is steering toward real culture instead of pop culture. The Correctness has taken him aside and spoken very sternly to him, and he assured us that he is still working on his 100 page thesis on why Transformers should not have testicles.)
The Correctness goes to Broadway!!
Before you head to the Great White way, be sure to check out The Correctness’s guide to what’s hot, what’s not, and what’s warmish. And what’s hot on the outside, but still frozen in the middle.